Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
and i looked up. we had an audience...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize