You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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