If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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