Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
