Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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