I'm really into asian looking animals
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
