Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize