Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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