do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
