Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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