We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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