Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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