We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
