terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
