I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize
