so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize