So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I look excited, but its just a facade.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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