Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
