I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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