CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
