Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
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