Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
tell me about the fingering
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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