I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
