I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
where am i from again
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
