Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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