life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
