My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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