just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
