and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
