She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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