Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Randomize
