Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
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