Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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