Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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