If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
