is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
