i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
