I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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