Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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