Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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