How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
