I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
