Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
