3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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