i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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