...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
