is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
