after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize