OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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