He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
